The Simple January Reset for Parents of Toddlers

A January reset vs a New Year’s resolution

January, a new year, a new start. It also brings pressure on parents to overhaul everything: prepping lunchboxes the night before, clearing out the snack basket, going to bed early, cutting screen time, laying shoes out by the door, starting potty training, giving up the dummy… and the list goes on.

Like most new year goals, these might go well for about a week. Then things start slipping, and by February you feel worse for not having stuck with any of them.

If big resolutions haven’t stuck in the past, it’s not a willpower problem. Most of them just weren’t designed for a life with a toddler in it. So this year, try a January reset instead.

Why resolutions are so hard with a toddler

Resolutions assume you control your time. With a toddler, you don’t. Naps shift, illnesses happen, and a perfectly planned morning can fall apart over a banana that’s been peeled “wrong”, or even at all. This morning I split the skin of a banana by a fraction, thinking it would be easier to open at nursery. BIG MISTAKE, Mummy. Needless to say I had to find a new one for the lunchbox. If something that small can send a morning sideways, imagine what a whole new routine could do.

Most goals also need uninterrupted time and spare energy, which are the two things you have least of right now. I’ve always been a morning person, and I’d happily get up at 5am to make packed lunches, get bags ready and tidy the kitchen. But if I’ve just been woken at 4am and asked whether it’s morning yet (this seems to happen a lot!), 5am suddenly feels hard. When a goal fails, it’s easy to read that as you failing. But most of the time that’s not the case – the plan just isn’t the right fit for you.

What a January reset looks like

A January reset is one small change, picked for the season you’re actually in. It’s not a new version of you.

A good one has three things:

• It takes under two minutes. If it needs prep, it won’t survive a hard day.
• It attaches to something you already do. Kettle on, then one deep breath. Nappy change, then a raspberry on your little one’s belly. Oh the power a little giggle can do for us.
• It still counts on a bad day. If a rough morning wipes it out, it’s too big.

Pick one: five tiny resets to choose from

1. Get a few minutes back in the morning. Most of the stress is in the transitions: getting dressed, shoes, out the door. Turning one of those into a game (“High five for each item of clothing” or “Follow the trail to your shoes”) often takes less effort than the arguing it replaces. For more ideas, try 4 Simple Games for Calmer Mornings with Toddlers.

2. Put the phone down for one moment a day. Not all day, because let’s be realistic, everything is on our phones now. Pick one small window, like the first five minutes after nursery pick-up or during snack time, and give your toddler your full attention. Small and repeatable beats ambitious and abandoned. You don’t have to be entertaining, set up a game or find something interesting to say. Just being there on purpose, savouring a moment of their childhood, feels good.

3. Do one thing for yourself that takes under five minutes. Drink a hot cup of tea while it’s still hot. Stand outside for a minute. It won’t fix everything, but it’s doable on the days when nothing else is.

When we’re rushing around, even one minute can feel impossible to find. Mornings haven’t worked for me, because although I’m a morning person, so are my two little ones. If you have early risers too, or you’d rather not give up any more sleep, other options are after the morning run, during nap time or after bedtime. For me, it’s after bath time. The pressure is off to get them ready for bed, there’s usually half an hour before we head upstairs, and it’s often when they play best. If you then need help getting them back upstairs, here are 7 bedtime game ideas.

4. Turn one chore into together time. Instead of finding time to play and get the washing done, let your toddler “help” with the washing. It’s slower, but you’re doing both jobs at once.

5. Pick one thing to let go of. Maybe it’s the spotless floor, or the guilt about screen time on a sick day. Dropping one expectation can free up more energy than adding a new habit.

How to make your January reset stick

• Choose just one. Doing two small things is how a reset turns back into a resolution.
• Try it for a week, not a year. After seven days, ask whether it helped. If not, swap it. That isn’t failing, it’s testing.
• Expect to miss days. Pick it back up the next day, without a catch-up plan.

The in-the-moment approach

I created Toddler Tasks on the belief that the best parenting help is the kind you can use right when things are going wrong, not the kind that needs a chart, a plan or a calm evening to set up. That’s the idea behind this whole reset: small, flexible and usable in the middle of a real day.

If mornings are where you’d most like some relief this January, my free Morning Routine Game Starter Kit has simple game-based ideas you can pick up and use straight away. Pop your email in below and I’ll send it over.

Start your January reset with one small thing

You don’t need a new routine, a new schedule or a new you. Pick one tiny change, try it for a week, and see how it feels.